Neutrality: The ability to neutrally observe thoughts, feelings, and sensations as passing events.
Being able to remain neutral is a big part of mindfulness as it gives us the chance to observe what is happening. However, it can also be difficult to do as thoughts and beliefs are so close to us, and always have been. Usually, people can’t see that what they think was created at some point in their life, based on life events, or learned from people who were influential for them.
Neutrality, in the mindfulness sense, is the ability to non-judgmentally watch thoughts as if they were passing mental events. As a result, with more objectivity, default anxious reactions can slowly be replaced with more relaxed mindful responses. For example, instead of immediately thinking “I am angry”, when the feeling of anger arises, you could also observe: “There is anger here”.
Another approach is to add the phrase, “I am having the thought that…” This method creates distance from the thought and the immediate relating to that thought as if it is real and true. For example, you could observe, “I am having the thought that because Jack is late, he doesn’t care about the meeting”. Or, “I am having the feeling of anger towards Jack, and my body is all tense”.
These approaches help us to step back from the thoughts, feelings, or sensations rather than just be one with them and be tossed around. As it all starts with the thoughts we make up in our heads, if we can watch them neutrally, without judgment, we can create alternative responses.
The goal is to be able to look objectively at what is happening in us at any given moment and to be able to break it down into its three moveable parts: thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations. Such neutral observation can help us to see thoughts as mental events and recognise that whilst emotions and sensations can arise in response to them, they are also separate from them.
In this exercise we scan each part of the body while neutrally observing everything that arises. The goal is to observe the fluctuating nature of things: thoughts come and go quite quickly, feelings may stay longer but also change, and sensations may stay even longer but also pass. The aim is to see that like life conditions, our thoughts, feelings, and sensations are always changing.
You may find that simply by stopping and turning attention inward, you may become aware of more than before (both positive and negative). Just watch the changing and passing parade of experiences without engaging with them or judging them or yourself. You may feel more tense at times, others more relaxed, and other times there may be no reaction. Observe all of it.
Whatever version happens, let it be a side-effect of the exercise and not a goal. Because the aim of the exercise is to train the non-judgmental concentration muscle, just watch all thoughts, feelings, and sensations neutrally, whether they are painful or pleasurable. Limit this exercise in the beginning to 5 – 15 minutes and increase later.